Can We Be Happy If We Stay Single?

Lee Bidoski
7 min readJun 18, 2024
A man and woman sit, embracing, above choppy water.
Photo by Justin Groep on Unsplash

Recently I was asked why I thought people couldn’t be happy staying single.

At first, I struggled to answer the question, not because I don’t know my answer but because my answer feels too big for words. It’s a feeling, a certainty that I’m not meant to live this life solo the way I have for many years.

I’m not unhappy being single. Sure I get lonely sometimes, but I can handle that. I have a ready supply of friendships and a rich mental life, and I’m the best at keeping myself happily occupied with work and interests.

I know I don’t and won’t just jump into a relationship nor be with someone who can’t meet my needs just because I can’t bear the occasional lonely bouts.

I just couldn’t figure out how to distill my answer into a sound bite, so I’ve been chewing on this question for days now.

The Witness

During these days, I learned that Michealangelo’s David was based on the David from David and Goliath. I’m not sure how I missed that tidbit of history that perhaps everyone else on the planet already knew, but for whatever reason that was so interesting to me.

(And that the sculpture was meant to capture him in the minutes right before the epic battle, ergo the veins engorged with an adrenalin dump — fascinating! Tho I always…

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Lee Bidoski

I’m a psychology professor trying to understand and improve our lives. Relationships | Dating | Health | Careers | Sports | Law Enforcement | Military