Hello, Jefe--I enjoy hearing your perspective on various pieces I've written--good to see you here again! Like you, I used to assume that when someone asks that question, they have a number in mind, the acceptable/unacceptable threshold, especially when the question is posed by younger people. But now, when older people are dealing with that question, I have a bit more forbearance. Like the guy I pointed out that asked it, it turns out he really was just scared about STDs, so it wasn't about 'the number he was looking for'. When we dug down into the reasons for him asking the question, he just didn't think through how to ask what he was truly trying to learn which was some sort of reassurance about STDs. So...I think it would be cool if the people who ask it think through what they're trying to learn, and also that the people who are asked learn to handle it with more grace rather than make the snap judgment that the person is awful for asking. Mutual grace, per se.