If The Person You’re Dating Won’t Commit to Long-term Plans with You, Ask These Questions

Here’s how you can tell if the reluctance is — or isn’t — reasonable

Photo by Debby Hudson on Unsplash

Concerts, weddings, holidays, travels, vacations — usually, you can’t just go to these events on the fly. They take advance planning to RSVP, buy tickets, take time off work, reserve lodging, that sort of thing.

On one hand, unwillingness to commit to plans is a classic mark of a commitment-phobe or that the person ‘just isn’t that into you’.

On the other hand, it can be a bit much to ask people we’re dating to commit to an event when we’re not even sure we’ll still be dating by the time of the event.

Let me show you some questions to ask that will help you better gauge whether the person you’re dating is — or isn’t — being reasonable when they refuse to make long-term plans with you.

Is It About Attachment Style?

My friend was dating his girlfriend for 3 months when she got a “Save the Date” for a wedding that was 4 months in the future.

“Will you be my plus one?” she asked him.

His response: “Let me check my calendar. If there’s no conflict, then yes.”