Such good points, Dan. You don't seem to at all resemble the first 2 reasons--eager to try online dating; eager to get laid. It was quite 'broad stroke' of me to make it sound like all newly-divorced people are itching to go online. Regarding getting laid, I do worry that I have presented Henry in a more negative light than I intended. Even tho he looked forward to 'getting laid', he does genuinely wish for that to be within the context of a new relationship with emotional intimacy. It just didn't work out that way, as he got laid but then the woman didn't want more with him. Like you said, that's certainly not exclusive to newly-divorced. I like the term you mentioned, "joint decision-making". I'm betting that that's what Henry wants as well. He may revel in getting to make some decisions solo, now, without having to constantly check to make sure it's ok with a spouse, but I suspect the pendulum swings so he (and I!) are quite willing to sacrifice some autonomy if that's the price of a good quality relationship. I like the idea of 'divide and conquer' -- If someone will conquer the cooking, I'll conquer the cleaning:):):) My best to you and your daughters as you navigate the post-divorce. I so hope the frustration decreases over time.