9 Perks of Marriage You Can’t Get from Shacking Up or Long-term Relationships

Part 4: Reasons divorced people warn you to not get married

Lee Bidoski
7 min readFeb 23, 2022
Photo by paultutacphotographer on Unsplash

When I said, “I might be interested in getting married again one day,” many divorced people booed me.

Don’t get married. Get partnered,” they said.

They claimed that other, non-marital forms of relationships such as long-term relationships, cohabitation, and domestic partnerships were way better than marriage.

One person wrote that a “seriously committed long-term hopefully permanent relationship” was the way to go.

“You can get all of the same benefits of marriage without the bother of marriage,” they claimed.

So I set out to see if that was true, and I found the answer: Not necessarily.

Here, in Part 4 of this series, I present 9 perks of being married that can’t be gotten (or gotten as easily) in non-marital relationships.

A heads up: Like in Part 2, I’m using a concrete object, lasagna, to help me think about the abstract concept of marriage. So that’s why you’re going to see lasagna mentioned.

1. You work less.



Lee Bidoski

I’m a psychology professor trying to understand and improve our lives. Relationships | Dating | Health | Careers | Sports | Law Enforcement | Military